The Asshat

It all started at breakfast...

We were discussing my sister's friend (who will remain nameless, mostly because I can't remember what it is) who, in his first semester of college, has been christened with the nickname Tuk (or some such spelling thereof). Tuk is a Canadian word that apparently means beanie.

"So," I said, "they named him 'hat'?"
Yes. Yes they had.

I noted that it could have been worse, it could have been asshat.

No one but me knew what that meant, and perhaps you do not either. So I will explain to you as I did to them that an asshat is either a reference to the phrase "I'm going to stick my foot so far up your ass you can wear it as a hat" OR the phrase "his head's so far up his ass he could wear it as a hat."

And, since I was way over caffeinated by this point of the morning (and for other reasons that defy explanation) I KEPT TALKING and somehow ended up saying how awesome it would be to make an asshat. Immediately, with Pam's help, I rummaged up some grid paper and proceeded to design a donkey shaped knitting pattern. Apparently, I do not use my ample creative gifts for good. No, I use them for stupid stuff.

And thus it was that I spend an entire weekend creating The Asshat:

Oh. Yeah.