The Avengers - a review

This is my very first movie review! I've never done one before partly due to the fact that I hardly ever see any films and partly because I am laughably ignorant when it come to things like cinematography or why critics seem to like dull pointless movies so much. So if any of you who actually do know real things about movies feel like mocking my philistine observations, go ahead, I won't judge that kind of ass-clownery.

That being said, on to the vengeance!!

Things I did not like: obviously it behooves me to mention the lamentable absence of Edward Norton as the Hulk. Really Universal? You couldn't cough up the money to make the world's most perfect cast in a movie that will be making you piles upon piles of cash? You must put your belly on the ground and weep with shame. Shame I say!

The other main thing that annoyed me is the use of small guns in this movie. At various points they are used (ineffectively) against speeding vehicles a great distance away and pulled on a freakin' plane. And when it came time to give Black Widow a weapon, what did they go with? Her traditional comic book, high-tech weaponry? Nope, two handguns. Um, Joss Weadon, have you ever been within three feet of an actual hand-held firearm? Sure, they are genuine weapons but they aren't exactly rocket launchers. I mean really, whipping out your sidearm against a fighter jet? Why? Was your slingshot broken?

Things I did like: all other things!! Specifically, I enjoyed that this movie actually ran with the assumption that the audience already knew these characters. It didn't waste time introducing anyone, if you hadn't read the comics or (more likely) seen all the lead-up movies, that was your own stupid fault. They simply took the establish personality of each character and let them bounce off each other to often hilarious ends.
Which is another thing I liked, this movie is funny, often when I least expected it. The entire theater was cracking up all the way through the film. Which, considering most of them were reading the Spanish subtitles, is kind of impressive.
And of course the casting was great (above noted exception excluded). Samuel L. Jackson technically played Director Nick Fury, but really, Samuel L. Jackson only plays one character and its name is Samuel L. Jackson. There were times when all I longed for was him to slowly pull his Pulp Fiction BAMF wallet out of his leather coat, set it on the counter and walk off without a word. Of course after he pulled his piece on a mother-fathering jet plane, I would have had to take the wallet away from him and thump him in the eye patch (though clearly, that would have meant my death).

This was the first movie I had seen in 3D since the technology really became mainstream. I thought it was very well done here. Like I said, I don't really know anything about camera angles and whatnot, but it satisfied my personal preferences of making the scene more life-like without making me seasick or jump out of my sticky theater cushions.

All in all, this is a wonderfully entertaining flick. There isn't any nudity or strong language (that I remember) so it's safe to see with your grandma or uncle or whichever of your relatives you feel a strong aversion to viewing adult content with (*cough*300*cough*).

So go see it! Ya know, once it finally opens in the US on Friday.

Sometimes living in Nicaragua is awesome!