Finally, a Decision

(Just as a side note, I find it hilarious that this post will be forever atop a posting about an asshat. Somehow, that just about says everything you need to know about me...)

Isaiah 58.

These past several weeks, I have been struggling with a rather major life decision. I found out (when I got my tuition bill!) that my scholarship had expired. I needed to choose between somehow, someway scrounging up the money to pay for school until I could apply for more scholarships and aid next semester, or leaving school early to pursue other opportunities. I can’t tell what is worse: trying to choose the lesser of two wrongs, or the greater of two rights. In this instance, I was choosing between two great things. I want to finish school and I also want to follow my calling.

I kept waiting for a sign.

But I got nothing. And so, in the absence of a clear and unmistakable Sign from the Lord, I made the decision that most aligned with my own core values. Last night, I formally withdrew from this semester and I will be forging ahead with a life spent in emergency relief mission work.

And then the sign came.

You see, the morning after I irrevocably made my decision, Haiti collapsed. And I knew I had made the right choice. I so badly want to be there, digging through the rubble, handing out soup and blankets and hope.

The Jews have a saying: Takun Olam – Repair the Earth. For me, that looks like feeding people who cannot feed themselves. It looks like getting out of this soft, stupid suburban materialism and spending my life on behalf of my brothers who have nothing. I see a world in which one child dies every 15 seconds because they do not have access to clean water. It is my Christian and human duty to not only find this unacceptable, but to put feet to faith and stop it from happening.

School can wait.

This is what I was born to do.